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TOPIC: Time for a daily joke

Time for a daily joke 1 week 4 days ago #188948

  • jackspratt
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DD wrote:

jackspratt wrote: In the blink of an eye, mike, you have gone from being a do-gooder, to merely a fun police. ;)

Keep up the good work. 👍

Are you stalking me Jack? That is some troubling behaviour.


You pulled that one previously, DD.

This time, as then, just fortunate timing.

Paranoia is never a good look.

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Time for a daily joke 1 week 4 days ago #188949

jackspratt wrote:

DD wrote:

jackspratt wrote: In the blink of an eye, mike, you have gone from being a do-gooder, to merely a fun police. ;)

Keep up the good work. 👍

Are you stalking me Jack? That is some troubling behaviour.


You pulled that one previously, DD.

This time, as then, just fortunate timing.

Paranoia is never a good look.

Sure is dickhead. Maybe you can use that in your desperate attempts to comeback to Australia under the guise of “essential travel” to get treatment from your shrink.

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Time for a daily joke 1 week 2 days ago #189114

  • westaussieguy
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I stopped at a friend's house the other day and found him stalking around with a fly-swatter. When I asked if he was getting any flies, he answered,
'Yeah, three males and two females.' Curious, I asked how he could tell the difference. He said: 'Three were on a beer can and two were on the phone.'

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Time for a daily joke 6 days 6 hours ago #189302

  • Leather Stops
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Blondes
REPLACEMENT WINDOWS
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them. Hellloooo,............just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him.There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up.He never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.

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Time for a daily joke 4 days 32 minutes ago #189418

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A man walks into the Election office and says to the receptionist
"I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections
to be an Independent candidate."
The receptionist replied "Certainly sir. Please fill in this form."
He was filling in the form until he came to the question:
''Are you circumcised?"
So he asked the receptionist, "Is this question necessary?"
She replied,
"Sir, I'm sorry, but if you are circumcised you aren't eligible
to run for election."
He asked, "What possible difference would it make if I were circumcised?"
She replied...."It's quite simple sir -
To become a politician you have to be a complete prick!"

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